Day 7: Your Connections

Do you feel stressed beyond belief these days? You're not alone.

Day 7: Your Connections     Today, I want to talk about loneliness.   While epidemics of a different sort have been on people's minds this spring, loneliness itself is considered a global health crisis in its own right. Many people are surprised to find out that it doesn't just make us feel bad, but it can seriously affect our physical health as well. Chronic loneliness decreases our lifespan and hurts our immune systems.   It also makes anxiety and stress much harder to bear.   Quality social support boosts our resilience in anxious times. And I'm not just talking about your neighbor bringing you an extra roll of toilet paper. I'm talking about how feeling like you are not alone in life has profound and measurable effects on our well-being. "Warm touch"—consensual, affectionate contact from a friend or loved one like a hug or a held hand-- reduces blood pressure instantaneously in many people. Cuddling with a dog helps calm the stress response. Laughter increases your ability to withstand physical pain. We can't all have a best friend at the ready, and in fact sometimes it's the lack of good friendship—loneliness—that is causing us distress in the first place. So this is a good opportunity to think about your connections and what you want from them. Which ones are satisfying, and which ones not so satisfying? Are there toxic relationships in your life that are adding to your stress levels, rather than reducing them?    This spring was of course a particularly strange time for social connections. With many people worldwide confined to their homes to stop the spread of COVID-19, individuals had to find new ways to connect. For some, that meant realizing the value of their relationships with loved ones (and even coworkers!) and doing more to keep them going. For others, it meant getting some space from certain people in a way that felt good. And for still others, it meant reckoning with increased loneliness and a new sense of unease that brought despair.  If you are looking to improve your relationships, it's okay to start small. In fact, it's even preferable. There is no perfect number of friends, or ideal amount of time to spend with others. Everyone is different with regard to their social needs. The most important thing is for you to reach a point where you feel generally satisfied and supported.   Take Action: Think about the people in your life that you feel closest to. Are the relationships balanced, and generally satisfying?    If there aren't people that you feel close to, or your closest relationships feel generally unsatisfying, think about what may be interfering with the relationships, and what you are hoping for.   List three things that you can do to repair or strengthen problematic relationships, or steps you can take to make new social connections, in the coming weeks.    Do you know someone who would love our Guide to Overcoming Anxiety? Tell them to sign up here! View our privacy notice and cookie policy.     BuzzFeed, Inc. 111 E. 18th St. New York, NY 10003   We hope you love the products we recommend! Just so you know, BuzzFeed may collect a small share of sales from the links in this email.   Unsubscribe