When I started going to therapy, a lot of the concepts were new to me. I especially struggled in learning to feel as opposed to just thinking. The first therapist I saw kept asking me to describe how I felt at different times. I would answer, and she'd say, “Okay, but that's not a feeling." I was always thinking with my head instead of feeling with my body. Then, even after I finally understood the difference, my vocabulary was limited. I'd say things like "Oh, that felt good" or “It was bad." Pretty basic! At one point my therapist started to get frustrated, at least as much as a therapist is supposed to show such an emotion. "Aren't you a writer?” she asked. “Surely you can come up with more descriptive terms.” I knew she was right—but it was difficult. Learning to pay attention to the felt sense wasn’t something I’d ever learned. I had to learn—slowly, and over time—how to pay more attention to how something actually FEELS. If you've never tried it, this can change your life.
None of these processes come naturally to me. Even after years of thinking differently, I still mostly think rather than feel, at least in terms of what I can pinpoint. Still, the goal isn't to perfect these practices but to integrate them into your life in a way that feels true to you. That’s what I’ve been doing, and it’s been helpful. 💚 How about you—are you able to understand the difference between a thought and a feeling? You're currently a free subscriber to 🌻 A Year of Mental Health. For the full experience, upgrade your subscription.
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Wednesday, February 21, 2024
The Felt Sense
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