Relationships are hard.
I found out about this show in "The Week," it's my favorite magazine, even if I do subscribe to so many of the publications they quote. It's what "Time" and "Newsweek" used to be, but sans editorializing, it's almost entirely a compilation of news from other sources. And it's expensive. But you could subscribe...and give up other news completely and be more up to speed than most people.
But really, I get it for the arts info. They recommend books and movies and music and TV and a couple of weeks back they listed the best Israeli TV shows, and there was only one I hadn't seen, "The Attaché."
Israel...they're winning the battle, but losing the war.
Everybody hates the Jews, and now they've finally got a vessel to express themselves, the Palestinians. And I'm not gonna change your opinion, I'm not even gonna try, because you just can't do that these days. I'd point you to great pieces by Bret Stephens and Tom Friedman in the "New York Times," but I'm sure you've got ammunition saying otherwise. And Israel is flawed, and Netanyahu has to go, but the truth is the Arab world wants Israel to go completely, never forget that. Or maybe you're happy about that.
So Israeli TV, pound for pound, is the best programming out there. Even if you're not Jewish. It's realistic. Genuine. And ultimately it's not about action so much as personal relationships, even when there is action, it all comes down to the people involved, like in "Valley of Tears."
So "The Attaché" is about a drummer. Who's married to a Parisian who moved to Israel. And she's gotten a gig as an attaché in the Israeli embassy in Paris for a year, so the family moves there.
And...
She's got a big, all-consuming job, and he's nowhere. He's a star in Israel, but nobody in Paris. Or as James Taylor put it so eloquently in "Captain Jim's Drunken Dream": "Up here I'm just a whisky bum but down there I'm a king."
And Avshalom speaks Hebrew, and English, but he doesn't speak French, so he finds it hard to communicate. The truth is many more French people speak English than they used to. I went skiing there in 1971 and I might as well have been in Japan, there was a wall between me and the locals, but when I repeated the trip ten years ago, almost everybody spoke English, it was not an issue.
But speaking of issues... If you've been following what has been going on in France, which I don't think most Americans have, they're too self-centered, it's a hotbed of anti-Semitism, and terror. Muslim vs... There doesn't seem to be a fix. And this show starts off with the Bataclan explosion, you remember, the nightclub disaster back in 2015. I was on a Summit Series ship, I was clueless, but then they announced it from the stage and it was eerie, to be out at sea with so much happening back on land.
So, if you're Jewish in Paris. Or even Muslim... You're terrified. And this is how the series starts out, and the theme returns, but really, you could scratch all the Israeli/Arab/Paris material completely, set this same show in America and...it would be just as haunting. Hell, maybe they're going to remake it in America, they oftentimes do, it would be easy, you're a couple living in New York City and your spouse gets a job for a year in Los Angeles, and she very much wants the gig. Do you go with her? You've got to sacrifice your work, but you want to keep the family together.
But when you arrive, when you're actually there, your spouse is integrated and happy and you're solo all day and resentful and...
Relationships can end in an instant. Something can be said and then it's all over, the other person just can't get over it. And small choices are critical. Do you reach in after the dissension, or do you pull away?
These are Jews, these are verbal people, they don't hold their feelings in...well, actually in this show they do to a degree, but the truth ultimately outs and then what?
You're rolling along, you think everything is hunky-dory and then one day...your spouse says something completely unexpected, you thought you were on the same page but it turns out you're not. Where do you go from there? You could say nothing, but that never works, that's a recipe for death. You've got to give your viewpoint, you've got to argue, but that does not mean there's an equitable solution.
Everybody only gets one life to live. And most people are not eager to compromise. On the little things maybe, but on the dream? Isn't that Marlon Brando's most famous line, "I coulda been a contender!" You don't want to quash someone's dream.
Situations change. Always. Can you adjust?
But if you don't completely cave, if you put forth your opinion, somewhere in the arguments that are now coming more frequently you realize...this could be the end.
It's a sinking feeling. You nearly go numb. You can't work, you can't eat... You don't want to believe it, but here you are. You want to hold back the hands of time, you want your partner to be who they used to be, but they're not. Doesn't matter what they promised you, that was then and this is now.
So do you hold on tighter?
Amazingly, that doesn't work at all. The other person considers you clingy and subservient and this makes them feel pulling away is right.
And the truth is ever since the introduction of the pill back in the sixties, divorce has been rampant. And some divorces are necessary, but the concept of hanging in there, working it out, the commitment being paramount? That's not embraced to the degree it used to be.
Commitment. It's the essence of a relationship. Bedrock. Commitment can supersede any problem, assuming it's not drugs or physical violence. And there's always a way to work it out, but someone is gonna sacrifice, someone is gonna suffer.
Or you could get divorced. But you almost always wake up later missing what you had. The new person is attractive and funny but after a few weeks or months you realize they're just not your ex. But once the rupture has happened, it's almost always too late to get back together.
And one person is not always reasonable. You can be, but they can't see your viewpoint, they don't want to compromise and then what? I don't know, I really don't.
And if Covid has taught us anything, you want to be with someone. Same sex, opposite sex, I don't care. We were not made to go through life alone.
So "The Attaché" is only ten half hour episodes, not much of a commitment. But at times I had to turn it off, it was just too heavy, I needed a break, I had to get out of that space. Yes, I'm watching the show and I'm thinking about the two major breakups in my life and...I don't want to go there, but I know it's always possible, the only person you can ultimately know and count on completely is yourself, if you think otherwise you're fooling yourself. The fact that two people can stay together for an extended period of time and make it work is almost a miracle, it's the hardest job you'll ever do. But the rewards make it worth it. At least that's what I've learned.
So most people will never see "The Attaché," since it's on Acorn. The best show on Acorn is "Line of Duty," it's one of the best streaming shows out there, worth the price of admission. Sign up for Acorn to see it. Acorn's only six bucks, but getting someone to spend, to get them over the transom, is the most difficult thing to do. And if you do subscribe, also watch "Keeping Faith," and there are other good shows on the outlet, but after the exquisite experience of the six seasons of "Line of Duty," thirty six episodes total, pull up "The Attaché," it's nowhere near as heavy as it appears from what I've written above, in fact at times it's light, but I'd highly recommend it, there are better shows out there, a bunch of them Israeli, but it's hard to find something this visceral made in America.
And once you start watching Israeli TV you'll be stunned how the same people pop up. The female femme fatale of "The Bureau" is a café owner's wife in "The Attaché." The reluctant doctor in "Srugim," the military commander in "Valley of Tears," is a musician here. They're actors, not stars, they're players, it's fascinating.
But maybe this is not what you want to see. Maybe you want light entertainment, diversion, your regular life is laden with enough problems. But if you watch the right TV shows, you'll get insight into your regular life, like you used to with independent cinema, but with TV series you can dig deeper.
So I don't know what is gonna happen in Israel, it's an impossible situation. Israel has the Iron Dome and Gaza, firing missiles, does not. Therefore John Oliver blames the Israelis. Let me tell you, if you're Jewish... It used to just be Roger Waters, now we've got members of Congress...you can't say something about women, Blacks, but it's open season on Jews. Of course that's not completely true, but that's exactly the point. No one is so American that they're part of a pure majority, the only people who are native are...the natives, and one thing is for sure, the Native Americans have been discriminated against for hundreds of years. Eventually you're gonna find yourself on the wrong side, everybody is going to be against you. And it's not going to feel good.
This is where Jews are today.
Hell, I'll just make this final point, which everybody seems to forget, Israel can only lose once.
So do I approve of everything Israel does? Hell no. The fact that there are settlements at all bugs me. But when they march in Charlottesville and yell "Jews will not replace us." and when there's a conflagration in the Middle East and the lion's share of the public is on the side of the Palestinians...it's just plain scary.
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